I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You can't just leave with hair like that
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm