Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Randomize
