Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize