Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
