This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
