i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize
