I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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