That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
