Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
