I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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