it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize