you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize