there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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