I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize