Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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