You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
