Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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