Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
