Who did Billy Mays play for?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
