Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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