also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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