What did we do last night that was yellow?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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