i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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