glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize