Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
