haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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