we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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