Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
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