Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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