don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.