and i looked up. we had an audience...
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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