then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
