my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
