the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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