Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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