did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
