We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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