Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
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I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
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I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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