Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
