Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
