Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
