I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
