I looked at my own cervix.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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