yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
