You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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