What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I wear drunk well.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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