I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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