so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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