So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
