I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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